Step Nine:- Having identified the people I have harmed, I will now go and make restitution to them. Unless to do is going to cause them or other pain or suffering.
Genesis 33:1-11 Jacob looked up and saw Esau coming with his four hundred men. He divided the children between Leah and Rachel and the two maidservants. He put the maidservants out in front, Leah and her children next, and Rachel and Joseph last. 3 He led the way and, as he approached his brother, bowed seven times, honoring his brother. But Esau ran up and embraced him, held him tight and kissed him. And they both wept. Then Esau looked around and saw the women and children: “And who are these with you?” Jacob said, “The children that God saw fit to bless me with.” Then the maidservants came up with their children and bowed; then Leah and her children, also bowing; and finally, Joseph and Rachel came up and bowed to Esau. Esau then asked, “And what was the meaning of all those herds that I met?” “I was hoping that they would pave the way for my master to welcome me.” Esau said, “Oh, brother. I have plenty of everything–keep what is yours for yourself.” Jacob said, “Please. If you can find it in your heart to welcome me, accept these gifts. When I saw your face, it was as the face of God smiling on me. Accept the gifts I have brought for you. God has been good to me and I have more than enough.” Jacob urged the gifts on him and Esau accepted.
The thought of restitution to people we have hurt can be a terrifying thought. We may still be holding onto some resentment towards them we need to let go off before we can amend our relationship with them. We may need to find another person to help us renew contact and communication with them.
One things we need to remember as we set about trying to fix our past is we are doing it for our benefit, not there’s. We are responsible for taking responsibility for and doing something about our past mistakes, we are not responsible for how they respond. Nor should we allow it to stop us from approaching them