Romans 7:15 I don’t really understand myself, for I want to do what is right, but I don’t do it. Instead, I do what I hate.

 No one plans to live a life where they are going to have to go into recovery.

When I first started drinking at the age of fifteen it wasn’t so I could become and alcoholic. I was having fun, I think! Because from the age of fifteen I don’t remember a lot about my drinking days. I was a blackout drunk basically from the beginning.

I drank to fit in, to belong, to be part of my circle of friends. I hated the taste of alcohol, but loved the effect of not having to face up to myself or anyone else.  Eventually my life revolved completely around drinking and I felt that my life could never be any different because I couldn’t live without drinking. Alcohol drove my life, until I came into recovery in 1987.

• What is the driving force of your life?